That's Italian

So, I've come to the conclusion that Date Nights are difficult when you have a baby at home. It's not the money, as the point of this blog is CHEAP DATES, but finding the time. I have been planning "That's Italian" for a few weeks now. The plan was for Kevin to make spaghetti and I would be in charge of the movie. I went to the Netflix site and entered the word Italian in the search box and Mambo Italiano popped up. Sure, why not? I'd never heard of it. It'll either be horrible or silly. So, our first attempt was a combined date night/family night, as Nana was with us. By the time Nana left, I was just too tired to follow through and date night was postponed....

When I arrived at home this afternoon, Kevin mentioned that he had purchased a bottle of Chianti. Perfect, I thought. Knowing we were having spaghetti for dinner, this was a great start to "That's Italian", although the thought of date night hadn't yet crossed my mind. It was Kevin who said, "Don't we have a movie for tonight?" Silently, I laughed to myself wondering how Mambo Italiano would pan out. So, date night it is. Sure, we will have to share it with Charlie, as we can't really ostracize our own child from the dinner table, and yes, we will have to wait to start the movie until after the bath and reading ritual, but we will get our date night in, between innings of the LA Dodger and Chicago Cubs. It was very sweet of Kevin to ask about date night, knowing that the Dodger's were playing tonight. Remember, I am married to one of the FEW Dodger fans in the US. And to think I suggested naming Charlie Dodger. Dodger Riant. Say it out loud. Doesn't it have a ring to it? Kevin is a dodger fan and his first game was at Dodger Stadium with his mom. Names have to have meaning to me and I thought this was a great way to acknowledge Kevin's love of the game and the memory of Mom. OK, so I got off track, but I'm currently listening to the game in the background as I await my meal.

As we were in the middle of dinner, (by the way, Kevin makes a great spaghetti sauce... my dad's recipe ala Kevin, my addition is the dried currents) I explained to Kevin the theme of our date night. "No worries, I didn't rent The Italian Job for our date night movie. He smiled and then I told him that, instead, I rented Under the Tuscan Sun. He looked directly at Charlie and said, "What? I'm giving up baseball to watch some chic flick?" I smiled. We finished our meal, all the while laughing at Charlie shoveling noodles into his mouth. We added some sauce to his buttered noodles and as you can see, a mess was created. Charlie was whisked away to a bath, where he currently sits in an empty tub. Yeah, you pull the plug, the bath is over until you say "I'm ready to get out." Seeing that all his toys are out of the tub (his choice to toss them) and the fact that Mama wants to get this date night moving, it's time to yank the kid out of the tub, dress him, brush the teeth, read the book, and put him to bed. It's Hammer...I mean Mama and Dada time.

35 minutes into the movie, Charlie is still up and fussy. Kevin walked in to "read" him The Hungry Catepillar and within minutes he was out for the night.

Just as we settled back to watch our movie, Kevin jumped up only to return with a bar of Trader Joe's milk chocolate. "I bought it weeks ago and I've been good to keep it A. hidden and B. untouched." My reply, "You read my mind and oh, you shouldn't have. No, you really shouldn't." (I'm trying not to eat junk anymore). You are aware that chocolate and red wine is an amazing combination?

For a complete "chance" movie, it was really cute. I cannot remember the last movie that kept me laughing. It was the Italian version of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, only the main character is gay.

So, to sum it up.."That's Italian" consisted of a family spaghetti dinner, Dad and baseball while Mom bathed the kid, a very funny movie with complete Italian stereotypes, good wine and chocolate, and best of all, I was in bed before 9:00 PM. Now, That's Italian!

Pet the Animals

Saturday found us not only on a family date, but a group date. Jon, Colleen, and Evelynn Clow joined us for a trip up to Little Farm in Tilden Park. Luckily for the girls, we drove with Charlie and the boys took Evelynn. This way we could have our own "girl-date-time" without the boys. The plan was for me to follow Jon, but the curvy roads of Grizzly Peak were just too much for him. I lost him within seconds. Like Kevin, he couldn't resist putting the car into gear and taking the turns as quickly as he could. Needless to say, I knew where I was going and was able to read the signs. We enjoyed the views and quickly arrived at the overcrowded parking lot. There was no sign of the boys or Evelynn. We waited enjoying our time together and eventually the boys arrived. They claimed they went the scenic route and were waiting for us. Yeah, right.

We headed in with our bags of celery. It was an amazingly sunny day with just a slight breeze. Charlie was off and running. First, to the barn to look at the chicks. They were so soft (blocked by a window) and fluffy. Charlie didn't care about these, but Evelynn and I thought they were adorable. We wandered up the hill to feed the goats, who had already been fed and weren't interested much in what we had to offer. Kevin and Colleen "argued" over the wild turkeys..were they or weren't they. Colleen won and I was thrilled. Colleen is wonderful and calling Kevin out. We headed up to the black sheep. I joked "Where's the Green Sheep?" (one of Charlie's favorite bedtime stories. What interesting looking creatures. An enormous mound of black wool sitting on four black toothpicks (legs). We all laughed about the "smart" sheep who actually came over to eat some celery. It was a hoot to watch the sheep take the celery from Evelynn, to watch Kevin shake that "thang" (the celery to get the attention of the "dumb" sheep) and to watch Charlie just try to figure the whole thing out. I cannot wait until he is just a little older so he can make the sounds. He does make a "haaaa" sound for the goats.

The best part of the day was visiting Curly and her piglets, who were just two days old. They were the cutest things and they were all pink minus the one "black sheep", I mean piglet. Now, Curly on the other hand was a good 500 pounds and Curly, really??? I was expecting to see a 400 pound Harley riding bald with a long gray beard guy, not a pig. And for the record, Curly is a male name. They should have named her Miss Piggy.

After visiting the cows, again very funny creatures up close, we headed to the visitor's center. They were closing, not much to see. The only change we would make is to go earlier in the day, enjoy a picnic, and head for a walk around Jewel Lake. Who knew there was a lake?

We ended the visit to Little Farm with a stop at Inspiration Point to look out over the Bay. It reminded me of our first date, "Sunrise, Sunset". I will always have a place in my heart for the Oakland hills and the "View of the Bay".

This was 100% CHEAP, better said, FREE! I have to say cheap dates with the kid and friends was quite fun. A day filled with smiles and laughter, mostly at the expense of the animals, some at the expense of ourselves, was worth while.

Window Shop

As you know or don't know, Tuesday is our usual date night as Nana stays for dinner and then gives us a few hours to have a "date". This time, Saturday was our day. After a lovely wedding for our friends, Paul and Lynette, at Sterns Grove and a drink at the Hyde Out (care of Billy), we were off for some window shopping on Union Street. We found perfect parking (a difficult task in San Francisco). However, before we could peak into one shop, my bladder had other plans, not to mention my stomach. So, in the theme of " 52 Great Cheap Dates", we cheated. We had a burger (for me) and an Ahi Tuna burger (for Kevin). So, we spent $50. We hadn't been out in a while and we enjoyed a meal and drinks without Charlie. I hate to say this, but damn was it pleasant. It was so relaxing to enjoy a meal without having to pick food up off the floor, make sure the kid is happy, and Goddess forbid, rush!

Now, with a full belly we were on our way. Union Street is full of boutiques and expensive ones at that. Which is I guess the point of window shopping. The only shop I knew was bebe and if you aren't a size 0, why bother? We did walk into a few shops and I just laughed at the price tags. I could buy an entire outfit for the price of one shirt. I must say, it brought back memories of Jon and Michael. The first time I met Jon was on their visit to SF and we spent the day on Union St. We shopped and shopped. Now, I can shop with the best of them, but I can also haul ass through stores. If I don't see anything, I'm done. I'm very good at weeding out the crap. Shopping with Jon and Michael, two gay men, what a nightmare! Enough of my date with the boys, this is about my husband. Lucky for me, Kevin is a great shopper. We spent time in Z Gallerie and found a wonderful couch that would be perfect for our place. Oh, yeah! Job! That's the purpose of the blog, cheap dates. I guess buying a $1000 couch doesn't constitute cheap.

Our next stop was an "antique" furniture store (Mid-Century). Not, my type, but fun to wander through and once again, laugh at the prices, yet still admire the beauty. We did make it into one of my favorite's, Twig (a Jon and Michael special). Here Charlie (who wasn't with us) found Nana her Mother's Day gift. It was our only purchase of the day and Nana with love it. Although, I will be adding my own personal touches to the book.

The day was perfect. The sun was shinning, the wind was blowing, and Kevin and I held hands the entire day. I can't remember the last time we held hands for any length of time. I look forward to the next time we go window shopping. Any suggestions?

Games People Play

So, last night was our official date night, but I was exhausted and pissy with Kevin. Needless to say, date night didn't happen.

Tonight, after a wonderful swim at Lion's Pool, I arrived home and told Kevin to get a move on. I knew we didn't have much time (I go to bed early) so our date night was modified a bit. I pulled out Scrabble while Kevin was on the phone (potential job contact...keep your fingers crossed). When he got off the phone, he sort of chuckled. "Did you do this for my benefit?". Damn straight! I would have preferred Yatzee, Skip Bo, Sequence, or Liar's Dice (we are lacking in board games). I have never really enjoyed Scrabble...too much thinking. However, I did kick George's ass once and that felt good.

I poured myself the last of the Trader Joe's Irish Cream (I told you we are on a budget..no Bailey's here) and Kevin enjoyed a low-ball of ice water. I turned on the CD player and Cafe Del Mar came to life.

Game on! I won the "toss" and laid down "van" for 12 points. Kevin was next with "cent" for 12 points. We were tied. I then used my previous word and added "-an" and created "van" again. Is that cheating? Anyway, away we went. I go for the easy words, simple 3 letter words and try to create two or three potential words for my next turn. Kevin thinks and thinks and thinks and thinks. Really? Let's get this show on the road. I couldn't believe it. Anyway, he eventually stole my T that would have earned me 8 points. Instead, I added "-ss" to "a" earning a whole 3 points, but feeling a sense of pride as I called my husband an ass as I laid my "-ss" down. Within one more turn I was able to lay down "pain" as in Kevin is a pain in my ass. My ego was getting the better of me at this point. Kevin took 43 points for "moths"- nicely done and later took 24 points with "zip". Lucky for me I was able to play on this and earn 66 for "quiz". By far the best score of the night.

I must admit that about 30 minutes in I was thinking about what I was going to write and yes, I had my notebook next to me jotting down a few key words that I would later use to help jog my memory as I blogged.

Final score Pain in the Ass: 278 Blog Writer: 217. You win some you lose some. Wait until we play Skip-Bo. Kevin doesn't have a chance.

So, it wasn't the most exciting date night, but it was cheap. It didn't cost a thing. I guess next time we could jazz it up a bit and play strip scrabble and see where that leads. My guess, you wouldn't be reading about it. But then again, it is me writing so maybe you would.

A little side note: As Kevin was putting the game away, I announced that I needed 20 minutes to write. "Oh, yes the blog. No worries, I didn't need to get lucky tonight." So, I'm going on 30 minutes of typing not 20. So, I'm signing off to go and get lucky before I fall asleep. Remember, it's past my bedtime and didn't I just say something to the effect of over sharing.

Sunrise, Sunset

Julie had her recipes, I've got our dates. (Thanks, Nana for the first line!).

This experiment is thanks to Kay Donaldson, who has been such an amazing friend. As those of you who are married know, it's a damn hard job. Add to it a child who's cute as can be, but still has his days, mix in a two bedroom apartment minus the yard for this adorable little one, stir in one middle-school teacher with 15 years experience that still doesn't cut it when you have "Joe" as a student, and blend in one unemployed husband who's never been out of a job for more than three weeks and he's going on six months and you've got your recipe for a lot of girl talk and the need for "52 Great Cheap Dates".

Kay is always texting or sending me cute little emails or cards checking in (mostly so she can get an update on Charlie) to see how I am fairing and reminding me that I am loved. Today, two decks of cards arrived in the mail. The first "52 Great Cheap Dates" (she knows we are broke and "52 Things to Try Once in Your Life" (she knows I need to remember the positives that life brings) by Lynn Gordon. As soon as I opened the package, I smiled. The first thing that came to mind was, "Hey, I should blog these adventures. But which deck of cards do I follow?" After spending a few minutes previewing both piles (should I say, that I was doing this while I was teaching...actually, I think it was before the bell rang), I realized I had already "Gone Fishing", "Changed a Diaper (too many), "Dropped Serious Money" and best of all, "Pooped in the Woods". I decided 52 dates with my husband, Kevin, might be more exciting to write about.

Shortly, after I made my decision, I chose a card. It was a beautiful day, Nana was planning on babysitting (our regular date night), and I was on a mission. I quickly emailed Kevin and asked him to have dinner ready by 5:45 so that we could leave by 6:15. "Roger, Wilco" was his response. Excited to put my plan into action, I breezed through the day even after the 1 hour and 20 minute 504 meeting that was designed for the parent not the student. For those of you who are educators, this is all wrong!

Nana, Kevin, Charlie, and I enjoyed a mustard-crusted beef tenderloin salad and a bottle of Rosenblum Zinfadel. I drank too much, not really, but it sure did hit me. Kevin decided he wanted to put something "nicer" on. I still hadn't told him the plan, but quickly told him "Don't worry". If you know Kevin, he changed his shirt. The clock struck, 6:15, I grabbed two coffee mugs (we're saving the enviornment and 20 cents 1 Breve Latte and 1 Soy Chai Latte at a time), Kevin said, "we'll this isn't what I expected" and off we went. "Head to Starbuck's on Lakeshore." Kevin dropped me off, I made my purchase and was back in the car in 10 minutes. "Head for the hills," I directed my husband. "How far?" he asked. "All the way," I smiled. We meandered through Monteclair and admired the houses (this is one of the neighborhoods we'd like to live in) until we reached Skyline. "Left or Right?" Kevin asked. "Find the sunset," I replied and to the left we went. Kevin spent several minutes of trying to locate the perfect place. I was unable to view the city from the first stop. Yes, I couldn't see over the dash. So, Kevin pulled out and tried again. Just getting "there" was an adventure. My Mr. Perfect husband was now driving me mad. Just find a spot! We can see the whole damn bay from anywhere up here, I thought to myself. Just north of Marlborough Terrace, Kevin stopped the car, rolled down the window, and opened the panoramic moon roof.

OK. We're here. Directly, in front of us was Mt. Tamalpais. Wispy clouds hung in the blue sky and the haze distorted our view of San Francisco, although you could see the lights from AT & T Park where the Giants were playing the Pirates. I knew I needed to enjoy this first date, but all I could think of was, "Shit, why didn't I bring a notebook to write with? I should be writing this down. No, I should be relaxing and enjoying this. How do I describe the colors? How do I...." This is so typical Charlotte. I need to learn to enjoy the moment and not worry about what is at home waiting for me. But it's just not me. My mind goes at 100 MPH. I decided to give myself some time to "stop and smell the roses", or in this case, stop and enjoy the view. Here I thought sunset equalled romance and all I could think about was this blog. I finally leaned over and said, "Wanna make out?" We kissed like teen-agers for a few seconds, nothing to write home about, but at least we did it.

The first thing I noticed was the constant stream of bikers (both bicycles and motorcycles) enjoying the clear sky and windy roads. As a group of 5 "guys" on bicycles rounded the corner, I said, "You need to find yourself a group." Five months before Charlie was born (yes, Charlie is about to be 14 months...do the math), a generous sum of money went to the purchase of a new-used road bike for Kevin. This beautiful bike is getting more attention from Charlie (he likes to play with the peddles) than its owner and I would like to see Kevin enjoy a few days/nights a week touring the back roads and yes, getting into shape. Losing myself in this thought, Kevin broke my concentration by pointing out a freighter leaving the Bay and sailing under the Bay Bridge. We watched him or is it her pass by Treasure Island, around Alcatraz, and turn left to make his/her way under the Golden Gate and out into the Pacific to wherever he/she was going. "China," was my guess just because everything is made in China. Besides, this is my date, my blog, and I get to create my own story.

I made sure I did do the one thing that I was supposed to on this date and that was watch the sunset. The sun took it's time melting into Mt. Tam, but as soon as it hit the top of the mountain, the sun quickly disappeared leaving Mt. Tam in an amazing sillouette. During the sun's departure, Kevin told me to hold my thumb up to block the sun so I could get a great view of the colors. I did, but didn't see why he was so excited about this. I must say, the colors were spectacular, muted, but picture perfect. The view reminded me of the southwest. I'm not sure why as I've only been there a hand full of times, but there was something about the way the yellows and oranges turned pink and purple and blended in with the blues of the mountain and Bay.

Kevin noticed that the only "action" taking place was at the ball park and at the Port of Oakland. Being that it is Oakland, I'm sure there was all types of "action" taking place below us.

While watching the clouds change colors, I decided to pull out the deck of cards that Kay had lent me and share my newly found idea with Kevin. I explained the idea of the blog and began to read through several cards trying to decide our next destination. We quickly discovered that many of these "dates" will need to be a threesome. Sorry, not that kind. Yes, Baby Charlie will be a part of these, but we are both looking forward to sharing these future outings with him.

Once the sun had set, it was time to go. It was getting late. 8:00 PM is heading toward my bedtime and we wanted to get Nana home (by the way, she was passed out, hidden by a blanket with the lights out when we arrived home).

What did I learn from this adventure? First, don't forget a camera. I want to document each date with a photo. Thank God, Kevin had his iphone. Second, "stop and smell the roses". I will be able to document our dates when I return and if I forget something, who cares or better yet, who will know. This is all about us, Kevin and I enjoying the hour or two we get to be by ourselves. Third, RELAX! Wait, isn't that what I said in number two. I guess I really need to make that a priority. Fourth, dating can be cheap. It only cost us $6.80 and we could have skipped the coffees if we'd been really trying to save. Fifth, this is going to be a process, not just the "dating", but the writing. I've been at this for over an hour (WAY past my bedtime) and I'm not sure I've finished. I guess I can always add more at a later date. In the meantime, I'm scanning the deck of cards wondering where date #2 will take us.